2 Years, No Alcohol: What I've Learned
The pro's and con's of getting off the sauce
👋Hello, my friend. If you’ve been reading this newsletter for a while now, you’ll know that I’ve been alcohol-free for some time. Well, it turns out that that “some time” just became two years. I thought I’d mark the occasion by sharing a bit about what I’ve learned over these past two years - the good and the bad - in case it might be helpful to you.
Let’s do it!
Why would you do THAT?
First of all, why did I quit drinking? I didn’t have “a problem”, in fact, I haven’t really been a huge drinker since my mid-20’s. So for me, it was more about my health (mental and physical), fitness, energy levels, and being able to perform at a high level in all parts of my life as much as possible.
It’s funny, I’ve posted videos and other articles before about things like how great non-alcoholic beer is, and people who have struggled with alcoholism kind of get mad at me and say “you can’t drink that stuff, you’ll be right back to drinking if you do.”
I get it. If I was an alcoholic previously I wouldn’t touch the stuff. But I wasn’t. And there’s a big enough portion of the population today that’s like me - choosing to quit alcohol for lifestyle reasons vs. addiction problems - that I feel fine creating content about this topic.
Anyhow, let’s talk about what the last two years have been like. I’ll split it into two overall sections: Upsides and Downsides.
Upsides of Not Drinking
No hangovers. 🤮I used to HATE being hungover - especially as I got into my 40’s. The older I got the more I felt like I was still impacted by a big night out even several days later. I just didn’t feel sharp. And I felt lethargic. And weirdly anxious. I haven’t had that feeling in over two years, which I love.
No missed workouts 🏋️♂️— I’ve gotten pretty serious about my workout schedule in recent years and I hate having to miss a session. I like to go hard and/or long on weekend mornings especially. Guess what you’re not doing the morning after getting drunk? Going for a long run or lifting hard for 45 minutes. I don’t have that problem now. I love mornings and I love challenging myself physically before my kids are even out of bed.
Setting a good example for my kids 👶— I’m not trying to teach my kids that alcohol is evil or anything. I have zero problem with my wife or friends drinking. I’m around them all the time (usually drinking N/As) and it’s totally fine by me. But my kids definitely notice that I don’t drink. And they notice when they see adults that ARE drinking too much. And they notice that when adults make bad decisions they are very often doing so under the influence. My kids will make their own decisions when the time is right. And if they’re anything like their dad, they’ll make a lot of bad ones along the way. But I know they learn more from watching what I do than hearing what I say, and this is one area where I like them learning from what I do.
Improved mental health 😊— I’m a believer that our mental health is very much tied to our physical health, and especially our habits, like how we eat, drink, sleep, and exercise. Overall, I believe that not drinking alcohol helps me to be less anxious, less angry, more patient, and happier. Sure, part of this is not having alcohol in my system and never being hungover. But I think the bigger part is being able to get into a consistently positive cycle when it comes to sleep, diet, exercise, etc. As someone who has a family history of mental health problems, I take this very seriously and look for any edge I can get in keeping myself mentally healthy.
Greater confidence 🦸♂️— The reps you get in declining alcohol or sometimes having to make situations with waiters, work colleagues, and others just a little bit awkward can help to build your confidence over time. It does feel good to be able to make your own decisions and to be unswayable no matter the circumstance. This translates more than you think into other parts of life and helps give you the confidence to go your own way in other places too.
Side note: I actually think there’s a bigger piece here about identity and self-worth. I haven’t thought (or written) much about this yet but I feel like most of us have self-limiting beliefs and we self-sabotage ourselves. I’m starting to think about this with regards to my physical fitness, asking myself questions like: “Is there any reason I can’t be INSANELY fit?” So far, I can’t come up with a reason why I can’t, which is making me think there might be some self-limiting belief there or at least I haven’t fully embraced the identity and habits of someone who is INSANELY fit. But I’m working on that, and improved confidence helps.
Non-alcoholic beers are good! 🍻— I’ve written and talked quite a bit about this in the past including in these two YouTube videos (here & here) which may have struck a chord because they have 48k and 17k views, respectively. Who knew so many people care about N/A beer? I still love Athletic Brewing Company beers and it’s been super exciting to see their growth over the last few years. Interviewing Athletic’s CEO, Bill Shufelt, was one of my favorite podcast conversations. In addition to Athletic, there’s a ton of great options out there these days including Guinness 0.0, Heineken 0, and many others. It’s now socially acceptable to be drinking N/A’s at parties which is a change from a few years ago. I now get way less questions, and at my 4th of July party, the N/As were finished way before the A’s…. maybe my friends are just lame though, I don’t know. Anyhow, these days, my main disappointment is if I’m at a bar or restaurant and they don’t have at least one N/A beer. I’m that guy who needs to talk to the manager in that situation and be like “Seriously? In 2024?” There may or may not be a negative Yelp review involved in these instances.
Downsides of Not Drinking
Okay, so there are lots of benefits and I’m sure I forgot a ton of them but there are downsides, too, so let’s not ignore them.
Awkward situations arise! 🤦♂️— I was attending a work event with a big client of our firm. He invited me and another guy to meet out in the courtyard in our hotel and he had a whole spread set up just for the two of us with all kinds of high-end tequila, whiskey, etc… I was like “Oh no, I appreciate the surprise here but I’m really sorry man, I quit alcohol a while back.” Despite the initial awkwardness, it ended up being totally fine, and funny enough, both guys ended up being pretty interested in my rationale for cutting down on alcohol and peppered me with questions for much of the night about N/As (and podcasts).
Then, of course, there’s the men’s golf league I’m in on Thursday nights where everyone goes back to the Men’s Grill afterwards and drinks bourbon and beer and I just drink a Heineken 0 or a club soda. I’d say fairly often I get a little razzed or questioned about. But honestly, I’m fine with it. I’m sure some people think I’m lame or whatever, but do I really care about some random guys’ opinions of me? Actually, I truly don’t. Like… at all. I really enjoy the golf and a number of the relationships I’ve been able to form playing in this weekly league. But I’m cool not drinking and often it’s very easy to see under the hood of the macho drinking-culture and realize that what you’ve really got are a few guys with low self-esteem or who maybe just aren’t too happy with their lives. Which is kind of sad to be honest. Anyhow, I’m cool dealing with awkward situations, even with the waitress who brought beers over to our table of baseball coaches recently and said “okay, here’s you’re fake Guinness, and here’s the rest of your actual Guinnesses”… uh, thanks, appreciate that one!You definitely miss out on some fun 🥳— Look, I go to parties with my friends who are drinking. I go to weddings. I go to concerts. I do it all. And I’d say for the most part it’s still totally fine and I can have a great time. But when you’re not drinking, you do miss out on the part of drinking that people love — the fact that it makes you lose your inhibitions, it makes you laugh more, it makes you feel closer to friends and family (before it causes the violent arguments and hangovers, that is), so you miss that stuff. And I’d be lying if I said I never miss it, too. But for me, it’s been a pretty simple cost-benefit analysis these past two years: The upsides I mentioned outweigh the opportunity to get giddy for a few hours. Maybe that makes me lame. But as I think we’ve established by now, I’m okay with that.
Missing out on some great beers and wines 🍺🍷— I really enjoy going to breweries and I’ve been to Napa before (in my drinking days) and had a fun time hitting wineries, too. I have to say, I still haven’t found a great N/A wine. I do drink “Fre” which is alcohol-removed wine, but I’m not sure I can hand-on-heart say it’s great. So I miss drinking good wines to some extent. The situation with beer is much better. I feel like Athletic and others have enough great options these days that I’m not pining for an IPA or anything but when I go to a brewery with friends and everyone is drinking some special brew there is an element of missing out. Honestly though, if there’s a decent N/A, I am good. If I have to drink water at a brewery however, I’m going to be in a bad mood and send the owner emails until they make a change. You hear that CEO/Owner of Olde Mecklenburg brewery in Charlotte? You are in my crosshairs, sir.
So there you have it, six Upsides and only three Downsides. So the Upsides have it… it’s just math.
I’m joking. I’m sure I’m forgetting tons upsides and downsides but that should give you a basic understanding of my experience to-date.
No alcohol… forever? Wait just a minute.
So, two years in… am I ready to write off alcohol forever? Funny enough, no, I’m not. I actually don’t want to box myself in like that. In my imagined future, there is a trip to Napa Valley with my wife and I’m drinking all the wine and not feeling guilty about it. In my imagined future, there’s also a trip to Ireland (maybe a golf trip?) on which I’m not saying no to every actual* Guinness that comes my way.
*this is a joke, I do not agree that a Guinness with alcohol is the only “actual” Guinness
But here’s the thing. What I love about this two-year streak I’ve got going is that I NEVER have to make the decision not to drink. I’ve already made that decision. Before I made that decision it was so hard because it was death by a thousand cuts. Literally, there were at least 4 occasions every week where I was offered a drink and had to actively decline (and use up my limited willpower stores each time). That gets exhausting. And I love that I don’t have to do it because everyone in my life (well, maybe with the exception of a few people mentioned above) already knows this. So they either don’t ask me or they offer me an N/A. In other words, once you make a decision like this and socialize it, the world adapts to you rather than the other way around. It honestly makes things so much easier.
So, funny enough, the main thing holding me back from enjoying a glass of red wine or a Guinness is that I don’t want to break my streak. And I don’t want to break my streak because I don’t want to re-introduce the need to make a decision about drinking every night or every week. That just sounds too tiring!
That’s where my head is right now, two years into not drinking. I reserve the right to change my mind anytime. But for now, it’s working for me, so I think I’ll stick with it.
I’m interested in your views and experience. So let me know what you think.
Appreciate you reading as always.
And I will see you in two weeks (with a new podcast episode!)
Greg
Content Diet
A special N/A content diet section for you today with some of my own greatest hits and the Huberman episode that started it all for me. This is all very safe to binge.
That’s it. See you next time!