I have a dependence, not addiction, but what's difference although I think there is, with sedatives and sleeping pills and anti depressants. It's been my sanctuary after 30+ years dealing with anxiety, depression, insomnia, loneliness, being outcast. And I do not want to give up on them, yet. They bring me peace and normality. I can act normal. I can sleep. I can be a nice(r) person. I can have motivation. I don't really care if people like me. I care that I like me. What do you have to say about that. Now that I'm approaching 50, jobless for the past seven years, almost no penny to my bank account, single, living back with my aging and toxic parent. Everyday I feel like ending it all, if not because of those meds. I see a psychiatrist every 5 months because that's how many times in a year I can afford him and he gave me those prescriptions. I still have my passion, I want to become a CFA charterholder still. This may sound adolescent but The Big Short really inspires me. Call it quick win, but it's not. It requires patience, observation, and due diligence. So that's my story. I hope I can still achieve my dream, and moving to New York, before my time us up, with or without my meds.
I have a dependence, not addiction, but what's difference although I think there is, with sedatives and sleeping pills and anti depressants. It's been my sanctuary after 30+ years dealing with anxiety, depression, insomnia, loneliness, being outcast. And I do not want to give up on them, yet. They bring me peace and normality. I can act normal. I can sleep. I can be a nice(r) person. I can have motivation. I don't really care if people like me. I care that I like me. What do you have to say about that. Now that I'm approaching 50, jobless for the past seven years, almost no penny to my bank account, single, living back with my aging and toxic parent. Everyday I feel like ending it all, if not because of those meds. I see a psychiatrist every 5 months because that's how many times in a year I can afford him and he gave me those prescriptions. I still have my passion, I want to become a CFA charterholder still. This may sound adolescent but The Big Short really inspires me. Call it quick win, but it's not. It requires patience, observation, and due diligence. So that's my story. I hope I can still achieve my dream, and moving to New York, before my time us up, with or without my meds.